The Best Christmas Present EVER

By Becky

Well, Adi and I have written a bit about alternative gift giving and approaching the holidays with the idea of community, sharing and love as our central focus.  And while it is not yet Christmas day, I have already received the greatest gifts anyone could give me.

The first gift was an opportunity - a job opportunity.  It felt as though it came too quickly and I spent the weekend feeling overwhelmed and confused.  Yesterday was no better.  I was asked to give an answer by yesterday afternoon and managed to buy myself one more day.  Unfortunately it seemed to make little difference.  One minute I was sure it was the wrong timing, the next I knew that I couldn’t pass it up.  And in the process i looked to every important person in my life for advice.

Gift number two - the people in my life.  From my sister who said, “remember that no matter what, just getting the offer is really exciting,” to Adi who put up with my stress and reluctance to let myself feel scared and insecure, to my mom who was a mixture of analytical reasoning and intuitive advice, to my dad who was so simple and clear “go for it!” to Eliz who said I can live without a car, to Irena who is willing to be there for me even though we don’t often talk anymore, to my brother with his “Totally!  It’ll be awesome!”  Clearly, these are some wonderful folks.  Each one had something a little different to offer me and while I felt like I was getting nowhere, the overall effect was helping.

So today I took a deep breath and thought “everyone is leaning towards telling me to do it, and they all have confidence that I can, so I guess I just need to have faith that this will work.”  And since I can convince myself of pretty much anything, I felt convinced.

Then there was the third present.  The one that made it hard not to cry at my desk.  The actual present itself is a car.  Well, the loaning of a car from my brother’s childhood best friend.  But the real gift was two fold.  Fold one - generosity in such an easy, humble, “I have it and don’t need it so I should just share it” kind of a way.  Fold two - the validation that what everyone kept telling me is right; if I am open to possibility, if I put good energy out there, if I take a leap of faith and a bit of a risk, I will be ok.  I can create the life I want and can help bring into my life what I need.  Simply by being open.

The decision to take the job means a quick move.  It will mean being apart from Adi for six months.  It means leaving the home that we just really settled into, leaving the UU community here, and that is heart breaking.  But, it is part of life and a new adventure.  And I am so grateful to have the holiday season to spend with Adi. 

Anyway, I already feel perfectly fulfilled in terms of Christmas presents.  I was given opportunity, support, love, encouragement and generosity.  What more could I ask for?  I just hope that I can find ways and opportunities to offer the same gifts.  While I feel torn in half and a sinking feeling at walking away from the life I just finally felt at home in, I am called back to the ways in which life will both ask of and offer you more than you can ever really expect.

Here's an online driving tour of the downtown area of my soon to be home! It's to the tune of Wanted Dead or Alive. California is so rockin!



And you can take a look at the beautiful nature of Northern CA! I will
only be about 40 mins from the beach!